Over the past two years I have been lucky to have life experiences that most people wish they could have experienced. So far my career in the adult industry has been one that I am very thankful for and I have had few regrets.
When I do interviews a few of the most regular questions that are proposed to me are “How long do you think you will continue to do porn?” and also “What is it about porn that made you want to do it in the first place?” The answer to these questions has always been one of the easiest for me. I have always said I will continue to do porn as long as it makes me happy, and I started doing porn for the adventure and excitement.
Over the past few months my attitude towards working in front of the camera has been changing. What was once exciting and thrilling has been changing into something that seems like a chore. I have continued to enjoy my travels and flying all over the world, but working in front of the camera no longer holds the same level of enjoyment that brought me there in the beginning.
My feelings began to change in December of 2009, and I thought that maybe it was just one of those phases that people go through. No matter how much you like your job, there are going to be those times that it isn’t all fun and games. In the past months it has been becoming clearer and clearer to me that these feelings are not simply something temporary but something that is here to stay.
With these feelings in place, I no longer feel that it is in my best interest to continue filming in the adult industry. While I personally feel that I no longer have a desire to do any filming, this does not mean that I wish to completely wash my hands of the industry and will never be heard from again. There are those that wish it was that easy to get rid of me, but to their dismay it is going to take a whole lot more than that. I will continue to travel and stay very actively involved in the industry, those that know me best know that I DO NOT miss a party. I will still be attending and presenting at the Grabby Awards this, and I do hope to take home an award; also I will still be performing at HustlaBall London. Just because I am no longer filming doesn’t mean that I didn’t work my ass off for my nominations; no pun intended.
When I first entered into the industry I had these ideas of being a big star and that everybody should love me because I did porn. These ideas quickly fell by the way side as I realized that in the great scheme of life, porn is just porn and holds no real value in my everyday reality. It has given me a new perspective on how I view the world and has also made me thankful that I didn’t enter the industry until after I completed my Bachelors degree, mainly because I feel at this point I was mature enough to make wise decisions.
In the past two years I have managed to be in 22 DVD’s and 9 of them I have been placed on the cover. In a world that is becoming extremely technologically advanced the DVD market is shrinking at a rapid pace, I personally think that me being able to maintain regular DVD work is a great accomplishment. Between DVD and Web works I have filmed a 72 scenes, which most were made possible because of my agent Howard who runs FabScout Entertainment.
I have seen way too many boys enter thinking they are the best thing to happen to porn, and also think that they are the best thing to ever happen to sex. Most of the time these boys disappear as quickly as the appeared just now they have made many life choices that they will regret for the rest of their lives. Thankfully I know that I will never feel this way, I am glad about what I have done and think that it has made some great character changes in myself.
I love when I am home in NY and cut through Times Square and I have a tourist stop me and ask me if my name is Ryan, or to walk into a bar in Melbourne Australia and have locals ask me where they know me from. As I get older and my looks continue to mature, I know that these occurrences will slowly come to a stop; but knowing that I have fans all over the world makes me smile.
In the 14 months that I have had my web site / blog I have had over 250,000 different viewers from over 100 countries. Every day I get emails and messages on Facebook from people telling me that they enjoy my work and special things that they like about me. While I just see myself as a normal person, I still enjoy getting these messages.
Thanks to everybody who has made everything that I have today possible, and I hope that you continue to enjoy my work.